Bought for around $2,000 in 1989 this couch has put in many years of good service to my family. It is also one of the things my friends remember most about my old house. several of my friends, my brothers friends and my sisters friends have spent hours on that couch watching movies and sleeping (as a fun fact: even Hollywood movie star Josh Hartnett had slept on that couch... A fact I chose not to advertise because I thought it would be tacky. Now I am wishing I had spread that to the world.) It is amazingly comfortable if not a little worn at this point. Although most of the 5 sections were in good shape one of the sections was completely shredded. I figured this and it's age put it's value right around $150. I was wrong.
After about a week of receiving e-mails about the couch and replying with pictures of the couch and it's damage with no buyers I was running out of time. I told Chewy and Frenchie that I was selling the couch, news which was not taken well. Frenchie even told her parents to buy it so it could stay "in the family." Unfortunately that did not come to pass and I had to re-post the couch to Craigslist for $75. At this price I finally had a buyer.
A woman from somewhere up in the boonies told me she would indeed pick the couch up and give me $75 for it. She said she would pick it up on Friday at about 8 P.M. Although this was a little late in the day for me I agreed because I had to be completely moved out of the house on Sunday at noon. So time passes and on Friday at 7:30 PM I give her a call to see if she is still coming. She tells me she is running a bit late and asks if it is ok if I meet her at my house at 10 P.M. I find this 2 hour time difference ridiculous and refuse, telling her to pick the couch up sometime Saturday (part of me was thinking they were just trying to meet me as late as possible so that they could murder me and steal my things.)
On Saturday morning she calls me and tells me she will meet me at my house around 6 PM. I was already going to be there to clean so I don't have a problem with this, but I do ask her just to make sure "Now when you say 6 you do mean six don't you?" She assures me she won't be late. At 5:45 she has yet to call me so I call her. She says she is running behind (not a big surprise I guess) and she will be there in about an hour. At this point I am very irked. Because my house is completely cleaned out I have nothing to do for the extra hour... I sit on my phone and play tetris. An hour later I call again... and again they are an hour out... very upsetting.
Eventually they do show up and it is like redneck Christmas. The woman I had been talking to looked like she may have been hot in 1982. Now she had leathery orange skin, hair so fried from bleaching I could have used it as a Brillo pad and huge growths on her face. Her boyfriend (brought along to be the muscle) had a pretty hard core mullet and a shirt that read "Harley Davidson: Lone Wolf" and had a picture of a wolf on it.* Long story short, you could tell these people had lived hard.
*As a side note: I find and clothing with photography of animals on it to be completely ridiculous. It is one of those things that is kinda funny if someone is wearing it ironically but unbelievably sad in every other scenario. Wolves are the animal I see on clothes the most... making them the most sad. Dragons are a close second.
I helped them move all the stuff out but did not help them put it in their truck. Their trailer was rickety and looked like it would fall apart. I was also doubtful it could even fit the whole couch. I did not want to struggle with the headache of how to get it all in, nor did I want to incur legal liability for it falling off the back of the trailer so I left it to my new redneck friends to figure out. After giving them the couch the woman pulls out $67... hands the crumpled wad of bills to me and asks "is this ok?"
Although the agreed upon price was $75, at this point I was just so sick of these people I would have let them take the couch for free just to be done. I did however say "well I would like the $75 if you have it..." At this the redneck woman pulls out another 37 cents and puts them in my hand. Her boyfriend pulls out a shit load of quarters and gives them to me "that could be around 5 bucks in quarters right there, man... enjoy'em brother." This is why I hate doing business with rednecks.
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